private investor wanted for small business in Lynchburg, Virginia For Sale

Hello,
I'm a local business person in Staunton, Virginia. I have been in business for 2 years. I have a small location at the Staunton Mall. I also travel to all of the fairs and festivals. I am looking for a personal business loan. Total amount of $xxxx.00 for a 90 day period. Your rate of return on investment is negotiable. I just started to accept all major credit cards during the last 5 months. The funds will be used to buy additional inventory. I'm just a hard working person who needs some help based on an old fashioned hand shake. I have no cosigners available.
While this is a risky investment, I am a much better bet than the stock market. I will also reward you far better in a shorter period of time!
Your investment in me allows for future growth. That leads to a better lifestyle for my family! The stock market does not have any personal need to succeed. It also does not care if you get a return on investment or even lose it all!
Bet on me as I am worth the risk!
PLEASE serious inquires only. Jay